Everything you need to know about sex crystals

Feeling uninspired, bored or just not really that sexual right now? Channelling the healing properties of crystals may bring some oomph back to your bedroom antics. 

Chances are that you, or someone you know, is into crystals. The new-age crystal craze has well and truly gone mainstream, with people carrying colourful rocks in their wallets to attract wealth, using them in water bottles to energise their drinks and charging them on their windowsills in the light of the full moon.

But there’s also a growing number that use crystals in the bedroom, too, and the crystal pleasure wand, or dildo, is the new sex toy du jour. It holds the same energy healing premise as all crystals — the stones are imbued with properties that your body absorbs and the crystals can be cleansed and charged via moonlight or saltwater.

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Crystals in the bedroom

Sexologist Juliet Allen believes they’re the key to amazing sex — both partnered and solo. And with the body+souls 2019 Sex Survey finding only 58 per cent of Australians would give their sex life a thumbs-up, it seems a lot of people could do with some extra help in the bedroom.

Juliet admits she was sceptical when she first heard about crystal pleasure wands, but she tried them anyway.

“And I’ve never gone back,” she says. “Vibrators are set on a high frequency and if you become desensitised to the vibration, it can become hard to reach orgasm when having partnered sex.”

Crystal wands are said to ramp up your sexual energy by adding their healing energies to the experience. But this category of crystals is still relatively niche. Sex-toy retailer Lovehoney says sales of silicone sex toys “continue to go from strength to strength”.

In fact, silicone Rabbit Vibrators make up eight out of 10 of its bestsellers, and the retailer says it currently has no plans to add crystal wands to its selection. However, Juliet believes the industry is changing and the major retailers will eventually get on board with this new trend.

What about vaginal health?

Just as women are swapping tampons for more sustainable moon cups and period briefs, Juliet believes they’ll also slowly move on from synthetic sex toys.

“There’s been an increase in awareness of sexual health and wellness, a search for more holistic options and more awareness of what we put inside our bodies,” she says.“The sex toy industry isn’t regulated, manufacturers can put whatever they want into their products, which can lead to issues such as bacterial vaginosis, thrush and an irritated vagina. Crystal wands are a natural product.”But, being natural also means they need to be mined, so sustainability can be an issue. And being porous, they can also store bacteria if not cleaned properly.

Registered nurse and naturopath Madeline Calfas says that even though she loves crystals and believes in their benefits when it comes to vaginal health, it’s always best to err on the medical side.

“The first issue is the grade and quality of the crystal. If you get a porous one, bacteria can cultivate in lots of little holes, even if you wash them,” she says. “The vagina is a finely balanced microorganism. Once you introduce foreign stuff or the numbers of bacteria are out of proportion, you’re literally growing problems inside of you.

“Some people have suggested using condoms with a crystal wand, but any of the purported health benefits are gone the minute you put on the latex. You may as well just use a traditional vibrator or dildo.” Whatever option you choose, Madeline recommends doing your research and spending as much as you can afford.

“Even with traditional sex toys, the quality is important. Silicone is non-porous but how good is the quality of that silicone? You don’t want little bits of silicone crumbling inside of you just like you don’t want fairly soft materials like jade, which is prone to chipping and flaking, inside of you,” she advises.‘’Go for quality from a reputable source, spend the extra money, wash it properly and check it every time you use it for little chips or cracks.”

Sexual healing

For those who have ditched silicone, crystal wands are about more than just giving you an orgasm, they’re about giving you what you need. Whether it’s cleansing your aura, clearing past hurts or emotional healing, there’s a stone to help.

Vanessa Cuccia, founder of US crystal sex toy brand Chakrubs, connected the concepts of crystals and sex when she left a sexually abusive relationship, started studying crystal healing and got a job in an adult shop.“I had access to every sex toy under the sun, but I knew that I didn’t just need to give myself an orgasm, I needed to connect to myself on a deeper level,” she says.

Discovering that crystals could be polished and carved into different shapes was a game-changer for her and she came up with the idea for crystal sex toys in 2011.“At that time it was scoffed at by many, but the more people began to use them and understand the depth of what they were about, the more it became normalised,” she says. “People now understand and are more open to sensual crystal healing.”

Known as ‘wands’ rather than dildos, the name was thought to conjure a more user-friendly, female concept and also appeal to the crystal-crazy millennial market.”Dildo describes an artificial penis, and though wands can be used just as dildos are, they should be considered as more of a tool — instruments of pleasure and introspection, facilitators of healing and, yes, magic wands,” Vanessa explains.

When it comes to using them, Juliet believes it’s important to set an intention. “Instead of just going for it, connect with the crystal, cleanse it, charge it and create an intention, whether that’s to connect to the potential for a full-body orgasm or to open your heart.”

Choose your crystal

Sexologist Juliet Allen says wands hold different properties, depending on what they’re made from rose quartz is the stone of unconditional love, which allows you access to your heart energy. I believe it’s the most popular because women, in general, need to be connected to their heart space to open up sexually. You naturally experience more pleasure when your heart is open and it increases connection when using it with your partner.

Obsidian is known as a powerful protection stone, which clears a build-up of bad energy in your aura. It’s more of a darker energy for women who are ready to dive deeper into that side of sex or kinkier play. It’s what people graduate to after rose quartz.

Clear quartz is known as the master healer — it amplifies energy in your body and may help you let go of old stories and patterns holding back your sex life or if you want to clear past trauma. It’s more of a lighter energy, very harmonising and opens you up to new ways of being when it comes to sexuality.