Lifestyle

Keep dating the wrong people? You need to read this


We all have that one person, if not more, who we know have treated us poorly in a relationship. So why do we keep going back? Jess Eva has the answer, and advice on how to quit them for good.

If you’ve dated someone that’s treated you like crap, it’s likely you’ve been in more than one relationship that’s very similar.

The reason we keep going back is that, essentially, our brain has formed a habit; a neurological pathway that makes us seek out people who are bad for us and it’s usually because we’re needing the attention we get from relationships, and not logically looking for the person that’s right for us.

“We have to stop needing even our partners, if you’re in a long-term relationship,” former I’m A Celebrity… Get Me Out Of Here contestant and new author Jess Eva tells Body+Soul’s Healthy-ish podcast.

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“While we have this need of how we want to feel, sometimes we get ourselves attracted to anyone and anything that will make us feel that way.”

Eva’s new book is titled Why Wouldn’t Ya and the very first chapter is based on this exact sentiment: it’s called ‘Quit Those Pricks’.

She suggests the key is to break the habit of dating people who treat us badly and instead, focus on training ourselves in positive self-talk with a seven-day mental cleanse. It’s called changing your inner narrative.

“It’s a seven-day cleanse in which you don’t entertain a negative thought in your brain to create a new habit,” says Eva.

Sounds tricky, right? Well, it is.

“It takes months to do because you never get seven days in a row all the way,” she explains.

“And so every time you think ‘I’m worthless’, you’re like, ‘No, I’m not entertaining that today’, because all of a sudden, 10 seconds of thinking that you’re worthless will develop into three hours of self-loathing.”